TNN 102

Hello folks.. welcome to our broadcast from latitudes South… we back again… an’ (deep voice)… dis is TNN….. So I’m de Baron…dey call me de sweet soca man.. (background music…. Baron)

Jumpstation: Drawin' to a close; Housing problems; Poundin' de pavement; What dey teachin' us?; Yuh know yuh is not a trinilimer if...

Well, its cricket time again!  West Indians vs. East Indians.. 

Yep, India is in de WI to play ah five Test series… las’ one finish in Guyana an’ end in ah draw, but some good entertainment…we captain Hooper leggo ah double century on dem an’ Shiv deal dem almost ah century an’ ah half..

De Guyanese play deyself in Guyana, oui!  Sawan also make ah score on dem.. da l’il fella good, yuh know.. watch he….  

Of course it had to rain, so de las’ day was abandoned… ah cyah remember de las’ time we had ah Test in Guyana an’ had sunshine for de whole t’ing… people say already to stop having Tests in Guyana an’ in any event, dey doh make no money anyway because of de exchange… But in spite of all dat, ah t’ink dey should continue because of de number of people who does come in Guyana… 

Antigua an’ all dem places cyah compare to de crowds in Guyana an’ dey does still get cricket, so doh deprive de poor southerners… dey country eh in de bes’ shape, so let dem get what enjoyment dey could get….. 

As I foretold, West Indies have to make big scores, because we eh have no strike bowlers… since Walsh retire, is like is guava season in de bowling department..  After ah man bowl 10 overs, is like he tired an’ he sendin’ ball dong all over de pitch like dey sprayin’ ah lawn.. so if we eh make ah big total, we goose cook an’ curry..dey go bowl we out an’ win de match. 

But if yuh make big totals, it mean dat yuh go run out of time an’ draw de match…we go see what go happen dis rounds.. but get ready because it go have drama… remember de old adage “East is East and West is West and ne’er the two shall meet”.. well we prove dem wrong, East meeting West now, so we await de outcome…! An’ de Cobra go give it to yuh live an’ direct…!

HOUSING PROBLEMS...

No, I eh talkin’ about shortage of homes, ah talkin’ ‘bout de fiasco dat went on last week in de Parliament. 

PNM come wit’ dey list of Speakers an’ UNC come wit’ dey list also (some 2000 names or more…de stupidity start early!).

Of course Papatrick decide he mus’ talk like he is king of de walk….oh, when we get to parliament, we will elect a Speaker, maybe not de Speaker we want, but a Speaker nevertheless… den “we will see how de numbers play out..”. 

Now of course dem couple statements put Bas on de attack, dat numbers talk mean somebody might jump ship, so wit’ drama suitable for Hollywood, he make al de MP’s stay in ah hotel de night before…. 

It was toooooooo amusin’.. big men leaving dey wife and family coming wit’ duffel bag to stay in de hotel, like little Boy Scouts, because dey hear of ah plot to kidnap dem so de government would have ah majority an’ therefore elect ah Speaker…

Now, ah mean… who, Who, WHO in dey right mind would hatch such ah plot, an’ who would waste dey precious time to hold one of dese clowns in their company?! 

Den when it come to vote, Papatrick stan’ up an’ give ah 90 min talk before nomination, was like bein’ on ah rack for 90 mins!  Why he wouldn’t shut up?!  He thought he was makin’ a speech a la Martin Luther King no doubt?   Ah mean, all yuh had to do was nominate an’ vote, de Standin’ Orders are quite clear; dis is NOT the time for debate or discussion. 

Den Bas an’ de boys nominatin’ dey own people, seconding de nomination an’ den all ah dem votin’ against de person dey nominate AND seconded….  

Apparently dat provin’ ah point…maybe not quite de point he wanted to prove though!  He say if dey cyah elect ah Speaker, den is back to de polls…. some people jus’ doh understan’ anythin’ beyond kindgarten…… if yuh elect ah neutral Speaker (which is what de Speaker suppose to be) den yuh still have 18 votes which is enough to block all government legislation an’ when de budget reach in September, yuh simply vote against it an’ den we have to go to de polls, because de Speaker will have to maintain status quo (no new budget). 

It means dat any legislation dat pass before den, you have de power to ensure dat your ideas are reflected in it…. But some individuals want not jus’ power, but position.. if I eh PM, I eh nothin’…  

He even refuse to sit in de Opposition Leader’s Chair, because he ent Opposition Leader he say… de whole world recognises a government in Trinidad, except good ole Bas an Co. How sad! 

Apparently 6 months is too long to wait… it mus’ happen now, regardless of how de country suffer, get divided or look internationally (not unlike his fren’ in New York!).

So Papatrick prorogue Parliament via Presidential decree (so he have 6 months to call Parliament again).. dey say de President shoulda tell him to call elections….. I thought it was de PM who TOLD de Prez. when to call elctions…. me eh know what Constitution he readin’… 

De final dotishness is Bas runnin’ around sayin’ dat he MP’s eh getting’ paid… well dat is a consequence of a non functioning Parliament which YOU caused.. so stan’ yuh bounce. 

An’ he want de Independent Senators not to take any salaries because de Lower House eh have nothin’ to send for dem to pass.. Hell no!  Is not their fault de Lower House eh meetin’….. what de Hell I does hear?!  An’ yes, people are supportin’ dis leap of logic… 

But I suppose what can you expect from ah man who says dat de government is using “Gestapo tactics, persecution and brutality” to stay in power….?  One of three options; give him ah dictionary and history book so he understands the meaning of the words, give a collective yawn or laugh till yuh belly hurt yuh! 

POUNDIN' DE PAVEMENT.....

Shame! Shame! Shame! What ah embarassment…….! Dey say it always worse when yuh own dog turn round an’ bite yuh…! 

When ah hear it on de news, first ah get vex, but den ah find de room startin’ to get bigger… is shrink ah was shrinkin’ from de horror of it all……

Yuh could imagine people who call demselves Trinidadians would picket de President when de man visit New York? 

Now is not to say de man went on ah vacation, eh.. de man went to collect ah award from de UN for his inspirational and ground breakin’ work in de formation of the UN International Criminal Court…

Ah was proud when ah hear dat..one ah we boys from little Tobago makin’ headlines an’ bein’ cheered by de whole UN, but ah setta ole goats decide dat is de bes’ time to make dey grouses known.

Is not to say de man is de Prime Mimister or somebody wit’ power as such, de man is basically a partially ceremonial Head of State…. an’ is not to say is Zimbabwe president come to NY an’ people protestin’ against human rights and election riggin’, de man eh contravene no law, he eh imprison or terrorise nobody…. all de man do is pick ah Prime Minister from two contenders, who, incidentally, agreed to let him do under the law.. an’ because he eh pick “yuh boy”, whose party yuh does support and finance, yuh vex! 

So we go show de so-an’-so we mean business!  Leh we show de worl’ how low we could stoop!  Leh we show how we have no class….!  To hell wit’ country image abroad, to hell wit de fact dat de man is world recognised for he contribution an’ come from YOUR country… at precisely de moment when de man is bringin’ honour an’ recognition to de country…  An’ to boot, is not “yuh boy” who make him President in de firs’ place?!  So settle for what yuh get!  Buh ay-ay! I never see more….

Of course Bas say he ent know nothin’ ‘bout dat an’ rather dan say it was inappropriate behaviour, he give no comment on it..  In dis case, my fren, yuh silence speaks louder dan yuh words..  

Unless yuh condemn dis kinda behaviour it go be ah free for all.  It go mean dat if de Prime Minister travel anyway, whoever doh support he party could jus’ come to de airport, hotel or wherever, an’ mount protest.. is open season on any public official, because if dey could do dat to de Head of State, who dey eh go do it to?

Apparently we still have to understand dat dirty linen should be washed inside an’ only clean linen should be exposed.. dat whoever is LAWFULLY in charge of government, the office gets respect, regardless of whether yuh like de fella or not.. 

If yuh want to protest there are ways of doing so, get signatures on paper, ask for ah audience, etc.. but apparently some people have nothin’ better to do wit’ dey time except walk up an’ dong de pavement outside ah hotel.. dey should throw ah bucket of water (or some odder liquid!) on dey stupid head…. because dey brains need washin’!

WHAT DEY TEACHIN' US.....?

Well de teachers an’ Ministry square off again over de same secondary school principal… 

De Teaching Service Commission sen’ suspension notices to 9 teachers for indiscipline an’ suspend dem wit’ pay… de notices were served by two jeeps of police men (about 4 or 5 police men I believe) at their homes (we goin’ by ah teacher…?! Hey, we will need back up on dis one.. I eh goin’ in alone!). 

A more useless use of resources would be hard to find… so de teachers say dey was traumatised, an’ want ah apology an’ de notices taken back because de principal being vindictive.. 

De apology ah could understand (“Embarassment was not intended and we are sorry for any that was caused”…very simple, eh…?) NOPE!  De Minster say is de chilren who deserve de apology because dey being deprived of school (…has a point, but then maybe TWO apologies should be issued)! 

Den de PM (her husband!) jump in.... (why?..I doh know.. you is not de Minister of Education, nobody ask for yuh intervention…..) an’ start to prattle about unions posturing an’ all kinda ole talk, which added fuel to de flames….  Common Sense 101 not evident! 

So de Union start to guff up, so dey havin’ “delicate talks” now wit’ de Minister, who I repeat should NOT withdraw de suspension notices. 

De Teaching Service Commission issue dem; let de cases come up for review, if it is determined dat de principal was being vindictive, den deal wit’ de principal, but yuh cyah dismiss charges because yuh FEEL yuh was victimised.. we might as well close all de courts den! 

But of course one of de teachers is ah Union rep., so de Union feel it mus’ support its own… but to flagrantly disregard the ruling of an Independent Commission, I think not….

The Commission’s decisions cannot be subject to the whim and fancies of individuals and unions.. dat is ah recipe for chaos!   An’ of course de poor chilren who have exams coming up.... Oh well, collateral damage…… ah wonder if dey realise how good dem chilren learnin’ dis lesson in “Conflict Resolution”……… 

Ah know not everybody is de same, eh, but
YUH KNOW YUH IS NOT A TRINI LIMER IF.....  

Every weekend yuh have to vacuum yuh phone……

Yuh doh know wey de nearest doubles stand is…….

Yuh cyah find something to eat in St. James on ah Friday night…..

Yuh frens does call yuh.. ”Ay …am….hear nah.……” 

Yuh plastic still on yuh new car seats after 6 months.. an’ it eh rumple…..! 

De las’ party yuh went to, “Jean an’ Dinah” was de hit song…….

Yuh wonderin’ wat route to use to get to work Carnival Tuesday…….

Yuh t’ink “Cricket in de Oval” mean it have insect problems dey…… 

De biggest gatherin’ in yuh house was two people….you an’ de mortgage man…..! 

Yuh does use de term “Yeah, I cool…” to mean yuh feelin’ cold! 

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Dat’ s all for dis weeks folks.. remember any queries, comments, questions, hail outs etc… just write to we anchorman Cobra at ttcobra1@hotmail.com an’ we go get back to alyuh… Peace, ah gone…blessings…… So we mus’ push one common intention…. for ah better life in de region…. for we woman, an’ we chilren… dat mus’ be de ambition of de Caribbean man….(background music… Stalin)