TNN 40
Hello Folks….(deep
voice)…this is TNN….
DEM HAVE TUH BE ON KICKS.....
Dis one take de cake….. an’ de icing too. Could you imagine, no, could you fathom wat’ possess sober people to commit ah act of treason?
Hear dis one…we holdin’ de FIFA under 17 World Cup here in 2001 (under who..? Yes, most people did not know it existed until we bid for it!). Well lucky us get de contract tuh buil’ 4 stadia at ah cost of $168M. Yuh know how we good in football, eh… so we builin’ stadia.. anyway dey say dat dey didn’t have all de specifications so now dey have tuh expand de budget…. dey miscalculate by about…am…lemme see…..$157M!
Yuh eh see people off de rocker an’ rollin’ on de floor….! We about tuh spen’ $157 M dollars tuh “save face” (yuh spendin’ tuh “save” ?).. we have $325M dollars tuh put on place for people tuh kick ball..? An’ it have school lookin’ like donkey shed…?
Fella, unless Manchester United comin’ here tuh play every week, how we go make back dat money…. an’ consider dat is de cost tuh buil’, what is de maintenance costs? An’ it better not only be football we could play dey yuh know, it bong tuh be multi purpose..
Ah mean, ah want basketball, volleyball, cricket, ice skatin’ .. every dam sport known to man mus’ be in dem stadium…. Jamaica sen’ ah team tuh de Worl’ Cup an’ dey eh buil’ stadium.. we eh dreamin’ tuh reach, but we buildin’ 4…. if after all dis we eh win dat Worl’ Cup is me an’ dem…. dey coocoo cook!
No, ah eh finish….. what sport program we have in school tuh train students for big competitions.. what facilities we have in each county tuh facilitate dat..? If Ato Boldon did stay here, de only t’ing he woulda be runnin’ is taxi, an’ Dwight Yorke woulda only be kickin’ heself….
UWI doh have anywhere where we could train people.. check it out..all dem colleges does produce world class players…man does go to college tuh hone dey skills.. not we… we doh even offer ah degree in sport physiotherapy, psychology, coaching, athletics…not’ing! Not’ing!
Once yuh enter UWI, yuh sports career done unless yuh doin’ it on yuh own…. Maybe, just maybe, ah jus’ speculatin’ now, ah not too bright, we coulda use dat money for comprehensive sport facilities an’ trainin’ programs in every county tuh keep dem youth dem occupied, an’ start some athletics department on the University campus to ensure dat we could continue tuh nurture talent…. but what ah sayin’ boy.. dat soundin’ logical.. ? No way it go happen, unless some people in dis country take ah long time-out…!
HAVE SOME MANNERS....!
Hee, hee, hee…. ah like de Caribbean, yes….. boy, dig de scene…CARICOM Heads of Governments meet tuh discuss 2000 an’ beyond (note we now meetin’ tuh discuss dat 2 months from de date..but den again, years have ah way of creepin’ up on yuh, ent…?) ..in TnT of course.
De Guyanese President say how we eh being true to de region because we eh buyin’ dey rice…. Minister Assam (Ass-I-Am) jump up an’ say is because dey rice eh good, an’ he eh givin’ de people no rice dat have so much powder dat we could supply all de J’ouvert bands for Carnival…
Well papayo, we Prime Minister, no less ah person dan de Honourable Bas (Boss) ketch ah fit.. he say how we shouldn’t say t’ing so, dat is bad protocol, an’ bad business, an’ will only bring division… note carefully nothin’ regardin’ whedder de rice was good or not…. so we could eat dog rice an’ get gripe, but we musn’t tell corbeau he smellin’ bad…..oooohoooo!
By de way, dis is the same Guyanese fella who when he walk in here say he have little hope of dis meetin’ achievin’ anything…. ah suppose ah man sayin’ dat alyuh wastin’ he time is good protocol an’ polished manners…
Buh wait, is Bas talkin’ ‘bout protocol…. de same man who was winin’ in public at ah football match in Miami, an’ who publicy cuss out ah next one ‘bout 3 weeks ago, an’ fully supportin’ he wife beatin’, wine like ah mad , “ah go shoot yuh, yuh know” Minister “Gunraj- Loose Waist” Singh….?
Ah suppose some people feel “above” protocol when in fact dey have tuh use rod tuh pick pumpkin, or have tuh look up at snake belly……
By de way CARICOM set up ah “quasi-Cabinet”, whatever dat is tuh implement some of de “unification” ventures…. ah jus’ glad dey eh call it ah “working group”, because I woulda be de firs’ one tuh tell dem dey have de name wrong… as far as I concern CARICOM only comin’, but never arrivin’….
NORTH STAND FALLS....
If dey doh like yuh
song,
De go boo yuh dong.. (tell dem!)
In de Nort’ Stand, in de Nort’ Stand… (Mudada,
many years ago, ah forget de year)
Ah yes, memories… well alyuh who was in de North Stand (or Nort’ Stan’) las’ year, it was really de las’ year, because come 2000, no more Nort’ Stan’.. no more passin’ pelau aroun’ durin’ Pan Finals, no more jumpin’ up on wooden bleachers till de stan’ shakin’ like coconut tree in hurricane, no more “Dus’ in Yuh Face”…
Yuh could remember de impromptu rhythm section wit’ dey bottle an' spoon, outta tune iron, an’ even more outta tune voice… many ah calypsonian meet he Waterloo because of de Nort’ Stan'…. even Sparrow geh boo when he eh come up tuh mark…alyuh remember?…..well vanish…voosh!
Now ah might soun’ like ah traitor, but de Cobra never put foot in de Nort’ Stan’ (except for ah few calypso shows)…hear nah, ah jus’ cyah take de dus’, sah…no brudder, is like de Sahara does move west every year…
Don Carlos and TIDCO (Totally Into Disasters Corporation) decide time tuh pack it in. Ah not quite sure what dey plannin’, ah mean Carlos already gone and pave part of de Savannah wit’out permission (dey callin it de Carlos John Boulevard now…ay, alyuh mout’ eh good , yuh know)..so dey might set up de Carlos John Stand now…
An’ wat does de ol’ Snake t’ink, eh? Well as a philosopher, I believe dat right now de Savannah scene is too small for Carnival.. is de same stage we usin’ for more dan 35 years now…if ah eh mistaken, ah t’ink de population double since den.. so dey better extend dah stage..
Nex’, de Nort’ Stan’ eh have no nice “sanitary” facilities an’ it have some people who feel dey could, as Kitchener say, “park dey PP anyway..” Oh gorm, man, mercy me…..!
An’ t’ings use tuh get ah l’il outta han’ wit de overcrowding.. look, ah remember ah section of dat Stan’ collapsin’ more dan once, yuh know…
I t’ink dis t’ing have more dan jus’ de North Stan’, is about accomodatin’ ah extra large festival, makin’ people comfortable an’ safe, about entertainment an’ how we should present we culture…. for now ah eh really have no comment until ah hear wedder dis is for Carnival or for entertainment in general… but lemme tell yuh, ah quaking, because TIDCO dem is de same people who host:
Miss(ed) Universe (60M and 60 tourists);
World Beat Festival last week which bus’ (in terms of organization, visitors an’ revenue) an’ cost we 8 million dollars;
den Carlos pave de Savannah (3M) dollars because he say rain go affect de Indepedence March Past;
an’ dey also hol’ ah Carnival Conference which dey hire (ah mean PAY!) ah foreigner tuh lead for de pas’ 3 years
Imagine ah US citizen researchin’ an’ holdin’ symposium on Carnival)… yes man, TIDCO.. now dey goin’ for we Carnival…alyuh start prayin’…..
That’s all for
dis week, folks….any comments, questions, ole talk, queries, comments, send to we
anchorman at TNN, de ol’ Cobra heself at ttcobra1@hotmail.com
alyuh take care, ah gone an’
ah special song for TIDCO……. Cause
we Carnival … is we festival….. is de greatest summer festival…..
(background music)…..
Ay-ay, ah nearly forget….Karen girl, way up dey in England…Happy Birthday! Blessings! Peace!
Views expressed do not reflect the opinions of KP Resorts, Ltd., it's management or staff.