TNN 81

Hello again folks…. ah back again ….. an’…(deep voice)… This is TNN…. Ole lady walk ah mile an’ ah half… an’ she te-le-le …(Kitchener) …..(background music)…..  Ah lot of news dis week…. de Carnival, a l’il virus an’ ah setta work had meh undercover (dem criminals had meh workin’ Carnival Monday!)…….

Jumpstation: Las lap; Up in de air(waves); Court-ing trouble; In we backyard.

Yeah, ah remember Kitcie kaiso, singing about how de Carnival over…… man it was like ah heavy tabanca when yuh realise yuh reach las’ lap… yuh chipping dong de road wit’ de ban’ an’ it only going through yuh min’… “Boy, dis is it till nex’ year, yuh know…” 

Is ah strange kinda feelin’ ..an’ nex’ day yuh pass dong Frederick Street an’ de place sweep clean… not ah paper cup, not ah bottle, no glitter… an’ yuh wonderin’ if yuh did dream about de big band yuh did see comin’ up Independence Square wit’ its hordes of masqueraders, dancing, jumping, waving…. alive to hilt!   An’ jus’ yesterday……

Anyway, enough tears… cyah bring it back… so what really went on dis Carnival.. de good, de bad an’ ugly…!

Yeah, dey did dedicate dis Carnival to Sparrow (he had got the Order of CARICOM for his contribution to culture in the Caribbean) but dat was overshadowed by de Bassman from Hell, de Mighty Shadow himself…

De Man sweep way de Road March title, he come second in de Dimanche Gras an’ first in de Soca Monarch… beatin’ all dem young boys an’ dem…

Every fete de man show up in… is carnage, man bawling, jumpin’..  "Somebody go horn yuh, pardner”  ..or  “When dey say rag, wave yuh rag” an’ is towel, rag, handkerchief, jersey, hand.

Whatever could wave, was up in de air….. Shadow rule de fetes, de road and de airways.. de man song on Domestic Violence getting adopted by the NGOs working to prevent domestic violence…  UNAIDS want he song on AIDS to be a signal song for dey campaign… 

Even in 1974 (?), de year of de Bassman, de man wasn’t so honoured or recognised… an’ ah long time in comin’ too… t’ank goodness he didn’t stay and plant peas in Tobago….! 

Shadow had music, lyrics, originality, relevance, everything  in he CD… well done brudder, take ah bow…. he say he does only compose for de sake of music.. he possessed by it an’ he does write to release de Spirit.. what happen after dat, happen…

Maybe a couple youngsters could take ah page or maybe a few chapters from he book (ah not callin’ names…..).... because ah see dey give de Young Kings CALYPSO competition crown to ah fella who singin’ wit’ah Jamaican accent (ragga soca dey call it)… interesting move….. we have to sing we t’ing in somebody else accent….. ah wonder if any Jamaican singers does try to sing wit’ Trini accents….?  AN’ wat would be de response of de public to dat…? 

Yuh give dem food, dey spit it out on de ground… den dey does complain dat dey hungry.. but yuh reap what yuh sow…   If de radio stations an’ dem encourage it an’ we Culture Ministry eh care to stop it.. we go all be talkin’ wit Jamaican accents… but lemme eh overshadow de Shadow wit’ meh griping…… Go Bassman, go…!

Dat was it.. jus’ bikini or short pants/tights, some beads, maybe a standard an’ some feathery headgear…  Design dey, boy!   

Dey say “Dat is wat de people want”… an’ get dis… dese “costumes” start from $800 and up to $1500…. yeah, we payin’ more for less… an’ as ah stan’ up lookin’ at dese bands ah wonder to mehself….what nex’?  

Middle income people go have trouble buying ah costume, after dey spend dey money in tents an’ one or two fetes….. so who go be playin’ mas…?  Is now ah prestige t’ing to play wit’ certain bands.. so Carnival is no longer a day of celebration, release, artistic talent, creativity, portrayal, even education.

Ah remember some years ago when band pas’ , was like ah history lesson, men research de mas, come up wit’ concepts an’ educatin’ you in de process, because if yuh listen to dem explain dey band, each  section mean something..  Not again!……we rapidly going dong de spiral to ah parade of people who could afford bikinis and beads.. an’ doh say we goin’ dong the Rio route, because Rio has an indigenous  samba dance dey does practice for months before to perform.. we jus’ jumpin’ up…. 

Ah see poor Wayne Berkely wit’ ah medium size band dis year, nice designs, but few young people….. Wayne used to be running neck an’ neck for Big Band of the Year title….. wey we goin’?  

So many young designers out of designing an’ art school, give dem ah chance to design for de bands, nah…. leh we see some interpretation, leh we see use of cloth, colours and shape…. leh we see portrayal and art on de street.. leh meh see ah landscape painting come alive an’ prance up in front meh… lemme see ah human art gallery…dat is MAS!  At least de mas I know…! 

But maybe I from de ole school, an’ dey say t’ings must change… but always for de better man… if some people want skimpy mas, I have no problem wit’ dat, but de whole Carnival cyah be dat… why yuh mus’ throw way de odder mas… why dey cyah exist side by side?  

Why not design some sections wit’ less, some wit’ more cloth?  Mix and match, man….. ah on meh knees, because if dis continue, we eh go have nothing to offer de world or worse, de nex generation…..

Now dey wanted to wear thongs dis year on de street…. now if you wear ah thong, what you could tell yuh children NOT to wear?!  Eh?!  Ah have nothing further to say.… sow de wind, reap de whirlwind…..one might say ah makin’ meh comments “tongue in cheek”.   

Leh we get back to de history an’ meanin’ of mas, man.. dat is what define we.. de mas where everybody who wanted to play coulda save ah lil money an’ buy ah costume….. is jus’ rank capitalism now… if yuh poor, watch on.. no room for you in dis…. an’ leh we eh talk about de jam session outside de Savannah..  Maybe nex’ year dey will realise de importance of routing bands and givin’ dem certain time slots to arrive.. like de Children’s Mas (an' see how well dat works..?).  But more of dat some other time….. at least one t’ing we still salvage is de life of de people… when yuh see dem on de streets makin’ dey manima… man yuh could jus’ jump in an’ dance along.. is ah freedom road dis rounds…. one love……. leh we keep it so…!

What a sorry state of affairs... to give alyuh de background, ah suppose alyuh know already dat President Robbie decide to appoint de seven defeated government candidates to the Senate.  

Well Bas make two of dem ah t'ink, junior Ministers.  So Abu (Ah-Boo-boo) Bakr gone on ah radio talk show an' say if Bas make Mr. Augustus de Security Minister is trouble in de government cootiyah!  Den he leave an’ gone Mecca…..to pray…. hmmmm.   Somet’ing isn’t right here…. 

So Bas say he go take de station off de air if he fin' dey break any rules....   Now how de hell ah interviewer go know what ah interviewee go say unless yuh muzzle de fella (deny him he free speech?).   De interviewer get vex and resign he job (he good, yes.. Bas wasn't runnin' me from my job.. he woulda have to come in an' fire meh!).  

Nex' t'ing de station manager (ah Opposition supporter), under pressure, resign..... remember de owner of de station is ah Government Minister!  Look t'ing!  Baccahnal!  Instead of being thankful dat de man play he han’ an’ give him ah warnin’ so he could have de security services shadow him…. Bas vex!  But De story continues…..

COURT-ING TROUBLE...

Bas in ah fightin’ mood dese days.. he say de case against he former Minister “Loose Waist” Singh (27 charges of fraud an’ now murder, yes, murder…ah former Minsiter!) is ah part of ah plot to smear de government an’ he ask de Director of Public Prosecutions (DPP) why he ent chargin’ people who claim to break into banks' accounts (de now dead  son of an Opposition Senator told de father dey hack into ah computer in de bank an’ see ah Minister wit’ $12M nex’ to he name) instead of “harassing” de Minister.  

De DPP had to remind him dat at de time, hacking was not against de law.  Bas also asked why de DPP eh pursuin’ Abu (Ah Boo-Boo) Bakr who get taped conversations of one of he former Ministers talkin’ about corruption in de government.. same answer, it is not a crime under de law….. seems he coulda check wit’ de AG an’ ask him to write to de DPP before makin’ ah public spectacle (real damn fool!) of heself…!

Not content wit’ dat attack on de poor DPP, Bas an’ he sidekick de Ag, “Twist Mouth” Maraj gone for de media an’ de judiciary… dem boys hang up in court over de election petitions wit’ Gypsy an’ Chaitan (Chaits)..

Now lemme make dis clear… dese two fellas sign ah false declaration sayin’ dat de didn’t owe allegiance to any foreign country when dey was signing up nomination papers.. which was ah lie… but dey win de seats an’ get into Parliament…  Of course de Opposition want dem out an’ file for such….

Now in my non lawyer mind, allyuh performed ah criminal act of fraud (punishable by jail) to get into Parliament an’ now goin’ to de court an’ sayin’ it is yuh Constitutional right to represent people (WRONG… it is a right but not a Constitutional one) in spite of de fact dat yuh get dey by fraudelent means…. an’ lawyers defendin’ dat! ..to de Privy Council!  

Embarassment chokin’ meh…. look, I feelin’ shame for dem fellas.. dey cyah carry all dat shame alone!   Of course de court dismiss dat nonsense an’ say let de hearings for filing false papers begin….. 

If it turns out to be true (and is so obvious because is after nomination day, dey now going to get dey odder passport revoke, when you know what hit de fan!) it means dat ah government out of power because dey go have ah minority of seats. 

57 lawyers in de Law Association sign ah petition asking Twist Mouth to resign, de Chief Justice lay-lay he tail, de newspapers lambaste him, de Law Association condemn him…. but de man say dey misunderstand him… all ah we is damn fools in odder words! 

So he blame de media for de trouble (all de media do was carry de statement…. dey ent interpret it)..  Bas backin’ him up an’ say it eh have no way dis country go have “government by court”, in odder words he will refuse to accept a decision dat say he gov’t have to step down.. he goin’ to call ah elections first! 

So no law court is goin’ to dictate to dis government!  Did someone say “Banana Republic”… yes, because dat is what he headin’ for..  

Ah PM refusin’ to accept ah court decision if it go against him…?!   In Guyana, de courts say de elections was illegal an’ stop de government from makin’ any more binding decisions, and dey goin’ to ah early elections Monday…. but not dis government! 

Now Bas holdin’ all kinda meetings up an’ dong de country raging dat de Judiciary, de media, de Opposition, newspaper columnists, etc… tryin’ to oust he government from power an’ callin’ on supporters to defend de government “with full force”. 

He even say dat “rogue cops” in de Police Service stopping de gov’t’s plan against crime from workin’.   De Police had to defend deyself… 

Den he turn round an’ say de Opposition Leader misinterpret he words an’ try to turn de Police Force against him….. chicken without head behaviour! 

I would suggest ah heavy dose of Prozac an’ a padded room for de brudder!  De gov’t doh need anybody to make it look bad or bring it dong…. it doin’ ah good job on its own!

IN WE BACKYARD....

Cricket, lovely cricket… well guess what? De South Africans have arrived here in de WI to play us.  Yep, we finally having ah Test an’ One Day series at home.  

After getting lick up sad in England and Australia, we now have the bes’ all round team in de worl’ to face in we own back yard.  

We always hard to beat at home, so we hoping for de tradition to continue. The West Indies Cricket(y) Board has featured more dan de cricketers in de news… check it out…

We captain an’ vice captain from de las’ Australian tour get demoted and dropped completely from de side…. no questions asked.   So man went from top to out with no stops in between!  Woooo boy!   Then dey take Hooper (de Vooper) who eh play International Cricket for two years but score well in de Busta Cup regional cricket (with de level of cricket in the West Indies at present, it eh too hard to score runs in a regional tournament…if I did bat, I woulda score too…), so dey bring him in de side…as captain! 

So de man went from out in de cold (by his choice, I might add…. he bus’ it in middle of ah series) to de heat of de kitchen….  What marvels the Board can work when it puts its mind to it……! 

This should really be an interesting series….. A captain who is known to get out suddenly and stupid and eh play Test Cricket two years now comes in as captain… and to add insult to injury, dey arrange to have de Busta Cup finish 3 days before de Test match start, so players on de WI team have to scramble to get one practice de day before dey play de South Africans… AND…. dey have 5 Tests and 7 One Day matches… a most punishing schedule after coming back from Australia less than two months ago (de strongest team in de worl’), an having to come an’ play in the regional cricket at a country level before facing de South Africans.  

So we starting tired…. how much longer yuh t’ink we will hold on?

UPDATE

Well like ah go have to eat meh words, at least for now.. because de WI jus’ draw de First Test Match against South Africa, an’ score more dan 300 runs in each innings (de firs’ time in 19 Tests!).  

What boy..! De young fellas put dey heads dong an’ bat man… an’ de bowlers was for de most part, tight!   De batsmen wasn’t intimidated.. de put stick on some of de SA  bowlers an’ appeared to be in control for de most part….

Vooper come back wit’ two good knocks an’ de team actually look like dey had ah plan!  We wukkin’, we wukkin’……

If yuh see we l’il 19 year ole Sawan, jus’ rockin’ back an leggo-ing shot… he make 91 in de secon’ innings…… Gayle come up good too , after dey did drop him for “disciplinary” problems…… ah hope we could continue de form on Saturday in Trinidad….. one swallow does not a Spring make…. ah hope dis is ah new dawn an’ not de las’ rays of sunset! 

Dat’s all for dis week folks… remember any queries, questions, comments, hail outs, etc… jus’ write to we anchorman Cobra at ttcobra1@hotmail.com  an’ we go get back to yuh… Take care care, laters..…. Peace….. Keep yuh chalice smokin’…. vampire passin…….…. ….(background music, Stalin)